Saturday, 11 January 2014

Positive vibes, man!

I'm really fed up of the word 'positive' at this stage -not what it means, just the actual word. I wish there was another word for it. I've used it so much since being diagnosed with cancer, and have heard it so much too. Truth is, I didn't realise how much of a 'positive' person I was before now. Not only in coping with having Hodgkin lymphoma but also at the rather annoying 'looking on the bright side' crap I've been doing with every situation involved in such a diagnosis.

Example A. -Loosing my hair. I've read in blogs and Facebook groups other people's stories, particularly women, and how it's been one of the hardest side effects to come to terms with. Even though I haven't lost mine yet, I can't help but look at new hats I'm going to buy and hope that my hair grows back curly -having curly hair would be nice (for those who don't know, after chemo your hair can grow back different colours and textures!). Example B. -Fatigue, and how from my point of view, being able to fall asleep easily will be a welcomed change. I've had some fatigue but not the last few days -I'm soo hyper and full of energy for some reason. Although I read this can be normal in the beginning.... and there's a host of other
negatives that I've turned into positives.

Well, there goes my gloomy faรงade so, apparently! ...It's not like I thought I was a negative person, but maybe just sometimes I can be horribly realistic? It can come across as negative anyway.

Whatever this is that's happening to me, or was already there and I didn't notice it, I don't really like it. I sound like a knob. After all, who wants a blog about some bitch who's like 'Oh isn't having cancer not that bad at all' and 'won't loosing my hair be swell?'...

So I apologise in advance if I come across as a twat in the near future and promise yous all, as soon as the chemotherapy side effects kick in properly (I've had two sessions/ one round so far -next session is on Friday January 17th), I will become my some-what negative, and down-right sarcastic grumpy self again ;) (-with a winky face for good measure!)

Oh and please do leave a comment if you have a fave alternative to the P word!

7 comments:

  1. In the words of Ron Burgendy, Stay classy. We're all thinking of you and will be with you all the way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yay super lady! Love the "sucks donkey balls" bit. Creative swearing is one of your stronger points. Remember I loves ya weather your having good days or bad days. I'm a negative poo so seeing how you deal with crap changes perspective on my silly things. You've even got me reading a blog! I've never done that! Woo go super kitty face! Xxx

      Delete
    2. Hahaa, thanks Tasha :) And look at you reading things -you're all grown up now!

      And yaaay to your negativity, there are no silly things! Fuck everything!

      Delete
  2. Cant think of any other words for the P word but if I do I will of course contact you immediatley, great rant by the way...cathartic and enjoyable as always! Go Kitty!xx ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks :) Haha, I think I'll just rename in the 'P word'!

      Delete